Journal ramblings

Scan 5


Enlightenment explained by a bird

I saw this video today and giggled at the fact that this bird’s quest is the perfect metaphor for my journey of self-discovery.

Just like this bird, I know where I am going and what I’m looking for. But just like the part of myself which I’m calling the sceptic, nothing seems to be happening: I throw my heart out and my piece of bread just gets smaller and smaller.

At least that’s what I think when I’m having a bad day. The truth is, I’m not losing anything. Worrying that I’m a misfit with no solution are all illusions of the sceptic that need to go. I am not throwing my tiny piece of bread into nothingness.

It’s just that I’m quickly becoming aware of things that were never right in my life, aspects of me which I ignored because I didn’t have the courage to face them. And it hurts to see them. But now I do. Now that I shine a light, I can see my dark corners. And having guilt or shame about these dark corners is not allowed because it’s all part of the process. And in a way, it’s beautiful.

So listen up, sceptic: I will be patient and I will keep you calm. That’s it. Try to cooperate. I’m just trying to make you feel it, even if only for a split-second. We are what we are looking for, man.

Can you feel it? The big fish is us.

Uma mensagem para os vivos

Quando eu morrer
Sera que o sol vai parar de brilhar?
As nuvens de passar?
E a lua de hipnotizar?

Casais enamorados
Barrigudos enfartados
Gatos assustados
Nada vai parar de pulsar.

Ao invés, tudo em que eu toquei
E todos os que amei
Estarão mais ricos e suculentos
Graças à minha presença eterna

Sem mim nada seria assim
Seria algo diferente
Algo mais voçê, ou mais ele.
Mas não seria uma parte de mim.

Então eu não morro.
Eu nasco e permaneço
No coração de todos com quem comemorei
E na memória de todos os que atrapalhei

Quando eu morrer
O sol vai continuar a brilhar
As nuvens a passar
E a lua a hipnotizar

E eu vou continuar a vaguear
Só que mais leve e descansada
Através de todos os que me amam
E têm a coragem de lembrar.

Mari Quotes

All problems are mind problems. Call it what you want: Attention disorder, depression, anxiety, fear. Training the mind is the only permanent solution. If you don’t, what you’ll end up with is a mind problem with no name.